Wednesday, November 03, 2010

Karaoke God





Original ad:


Karaoke and Live D.J. every Tuesday night at Xxxxxx Tavern in Downtown Villa Rica. 8:30 til 11:30
Great food and Entertainment.!

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To: James
From: Jacky Maille

Hello there!

My name is Jacky Maille.  I'm sure you've heard of me.  I saw your posting about karaoke on Tuesday nights at Xxxxxx Tavern.  I'm currently looking for a new place to go on Tuesdays.  My old Tuesday night spot closed down (despite all the great business I helped them get), so I'm looking for a new place to go.  Can you tell me a little more about the establishment?  Also, what kind of crowd hangs out there?

Thank you in advance for the information,

Jacky Maille

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To: Jacky
From: James

Jacky,

Thanks for your interest.  Xxxxxx Tavern is located at 600 xxxxxxx hwy in downtown Villa Rica, nest to Advance Autoparts.  They have great food and drinks, pool tables, darts and sports.  The crowd is a good mix of all kinds of people young and old (21+ only).  Karaoke starts at 8:30 every Tuesday night.  Hope to see you there!

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To: James 
From: Jacky

James,

That sounds great.  I may be willing to give your place a try.  If I'm impressed, then I'll definitely come back.
I'm sure you're aware of who I am, but just in case, I'll explain:

I am, of course, a Karaoke legend!  I am known in many places in the Atlanta area for my mad singing skills.  Every business that I frequent sees a larger crowd on Karaoke nights because of me.  Just ask the folks at Sweetwater Bar & Grill, Sportstime, or Loobies.  They'll tell you.  I always get free drinks from the bartenders because they see their tips double on the nights I'm there.  People always tell me that I could win American Idol because I'm such a good singer.  I plan to audition the next time they come to Atlanta.  I have many songs in my repertoire.  I'm always singing something different.  I usually do slow jams and R&B, but sometimes I'll mix it up with a little pop or reggae.

What I usually do is this:  I'll send my sister in around 10:45 to let you know that I've arrived and waiting in the parking lot.  She'll let you know the songs I plan on singing.  I won't actually make my appearance until you announce me (my sister will come out to the minivan to let me know when I am up).  I like to sit out in the  minivan and practice my songs before I come in.  I prefer to be the last singer of the show.  I always do one encore.  If the crowd is really good and feeling me, then I'll do two.  Afterwards, I like to chill at a table with some honeys and sipping free mai tais.

I'll be sure to give this place a chance next Tuesday night.  I'll see you then.

Jacky Maille

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To: Jacky
From: James

That sounds great Jacky.   Just so you know, the songlist is 1st come 1st serve.  I usually fill up the songlist by like 9:15 or 9:30 so you may want to get there early if you want to sing.  Hope to see you there.

James

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To: James
From: Jacky

Jimbo,

I think I made myself pretty clear in my last e-mail about how I perform.  You can ask any other KJ in the area and they'll tell you just how damn good I am.  I AM A KARAOKE GOD!!!  But that's okay.  You'll see how it is after one night.  Maybe you can come up to Sweetwater tonight where I'll be performing and you'll see how it goes down.  Trust me, you and the bar owner will be thanking me for my presence.

Yours truly,
Jacky Maille

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To: Jacky
From: James

Jacky,

No thanks man.  We're cool.  Maybe you should just stick with the places you already go b/c the bartenders don't give out free drinks and our karaoke is 1st come  1st serve.  Nobodys looking to get famous we're just all looking to have a ggod time.  Good luck
James

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To: James
From: Jacky

Jimmy,

Whatever.  You already said you hope to see me there so no takesies backsies! I'll be up there next Tuesday night to show you what I can do.  I'm thinking about doing "On Bended Knee" by Boyz II Men for starters, and maybe "Raspberry Beret" by Prince as an encore.  I'll send my sister in to let you know when I get there.
Are you looking forward to it?  I know you are!

The Legend,
Jacky Maille

3 comments:

Prince said...

I bet you get laid by a different chick every night of the week.

Menuge Keotki said...

I bet that DJ is going to be really nervous all night on Tuesday! You should totally go just to watch and see if he's sweating.

Anonymous said...

Were da fukk is Villa Rica????