Friday, September 17, 2010

Cock Retrievers Pt. 2: Jacky Gets Busted!

Back in May I posted an entry entitled "Cock Retriever" where I attempted to talk this dude into breeding his Cocker Spaniel with "Puddytat", my [fictional] Flat-Coated Retriever.  Recently, I ran across an ad where the person was looking for a Retriever mix puppy, so I sprang into action.  The result wasn't quite what I expected, but it's good to know that Jacky Maille is high up on Google's search engine.  


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Original ad:


We are looking for our first family dog and would like a 4 or 5 month old female golden retriever mix. Preferably a mini golden/golden cocker retriever/english comfort golden/dakota sport retriever... all of which are mainly golden retriever with a little cocker spaniel and/or poodle mix. Want the look of a golden retriever without the large size. 


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To: Michael Bxxx
From: Jacky Maille



I was so happy to see your ad online!  My Flat-Coated Retriever bitch, Puddytat (AKC Registered) was studded out to an English Cocker Spaniel (named Lawrence Welkbubbles) last June.  Several weeks ago, Puddytat whelped 6 Cock Retriever pups. 3 Male 4 Female.

Now keep in mind, Cock Retrievers aren't common yet, but soon they will be the most sought after designer breed in the world!  My deal is this:  You buy one of my female Cock Retriever pups for $1000, and I'll allow you to breed her with another one of my Cock Retrievers.  Soon we will both have Cock Retriever puppies sell Cock Retrievers to families all around the world!

Are you interested?  Let's make this work!

Jacky Maille




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To: Jacky
From: Michael

That sound like a good ideas but we dont have that kind of money to spenf....we are just lookingfor a family dog to adapt not to make investments.  PS you should come up with a differnt name for your puppies becuse Cock retriever just sounds vulger and you might not be able to make money with a name like that.

Michael Bxxx

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To: Michael
From: Jacky

Mickel,

I'm sorry to hear that you're not interested in being one of the first Cock Retriever owners in the US.  It's a well-known fact that designer dogs are the newest craze that's sweeping the Nation.  It's a can't miss oppurtunity.  If I were you, I'd take out a title loan on your truck or minivan or whatever in order to cough up the cash.  You're looking at having a litter of six to eight puppies  that you can sell for a $1000 each.   Trust me when I say that in five years, no self-respecting gay man is going to be without his very own Cock Retriever.  I still have two females left, so if you're still interested please let me know by the end of the week!
I might be willing to break up the payments for you; $500 deposit and $500 when the puppies are weaned and ready for placement.

Jacky Maille

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To: Jacky
From: Michael

FUCK YOU111
My daughter did an internet lookup on your name and found your websight where you have pulled this scam before.  We are a vry religious family and we are not going to be scammed by people like you.  

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To: Michael
From: Jacky

Mack,

Haha...I am often confused for the Jacky Maille that runs that blog.   That guy is quite the legend!  I can assure you that I merely share a name with him. Kind of like I'm sure you share a name with other Mike Bell's.  I must inform you however that I have sold my last two females to a nice couple in Midtown.  I'm hoping to have another litter early next year when Puddytat recovers, and I will contact you when that happens.  In the meantime, Jesus bless you!

Jacky

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To: Jacky
From: Michael

This will be thae last you hear from me.  I warn you that if I see my name on your websight I will call the police and report you to the FBI.  your days are numberd ASSHOLE111

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Glad to see that religion is working so well for this guy!  Consequences will never be the same!




2 comments:

Menuge Keotki said...

LOL!!!! Thanks to you the Jessi Slaughter meme will live forever! I think you did goof and put his name on there. What were you thinking? Then again, if he needed his daughter to look up a "websight" then he's going to have a hard time getting in touch with the FBI! Once again, you rock!

Wally Rockstar said...

haha puppies!